Week 6 on A New Weigh

I am half way through my challenge and last week I had a little stumble or maybe a big stumble, either way I fell of the wagon and ate a whole lot of crap over the weekend. I knew it would effect my weigh in but thank the stars I didn't gain any weight, I lost 0.1kgs and 2.5cm's.

I'm still very far from my target but hoping to loose at least another 5 in the remainder of this challenge. I am still battling with the exercise, maybe it's the cold, pure laziness, me always feeling ill, having a child and little time and a little bit of hating anything vaguely sporty.

But I'm still going and still trying and that counts for something.

And my support group is kicking ass and are a lot of inspiration on all my bad days.

Go check out A New Weigh for more info and give them a like over on Facebook!

Week 4 and 5 - A New Weigh

I didn't post last week, I was super busy with a hundred different jobs and couldn't squeeze any thing in.

I'm really happy,  over the last 2 weeks I've lost another 1.5kgs and 10 centimeters bringing me to a total loss of 4.5kgs and 30.5cm's!

I'm finally under the 70kg mark and only 10kgs to go before my goal weight.

I've been struggling with exercising which I normally do but I jaf an adjustment in meds and been feeling ill for weeks but going to force myself to get my ass moving this week so I can start toning my body as well.

Week 3...digging deep

I wasn't going to do a post today.

Loosing weight is a touchy subject to begin with, sharing it with the world on a public forum isn't as easy as I thought it would be, but being honest is what I am best at.

So I cried this morning when I got on the scale and the numbers hadn't gone down for the second row running.

Now part of A New Weigh is 24 hour support which is incredible, I'm in a group of 12 woman who are doing the challenge and on Mondays we share our loss. Theirs are all great and mine isn't shifting. Which can be disheartening.

I did loose another 5cm and I feel great, I feel lighter,  my clothes are getting looser and I'm not so bloated any more but not seeing that number go down breaks my heart. 

I know it's my insulin resistance, I know there is a chance my body won't shift the weight, I know it's an extra hurdle I have to cross that other woman don't but it still sucks.

I am not giving up though, Gaelyn (the most awesome couch) has given me some tips and adjustments to help me along and I am really going to push the cardio as I know it makes a difference with my insulin levels.

I will reach my goal weight. I will keep trying. I will not quit.

Week 2 on A New Weigh

The last week was a bit rough, I had a complete change in routine as I am substitute designing for another agency and when I change routine my body goes into panic, a little bit of insulin resistance and bipolar and I'm off the edge.

I managed to stick to the diet but the exercise was put on the backside with pure exhaustion and me being used to exercising in the morning.

I didn't loose weight but thankfully didn't put any on, I did loose 8.5 centimeters so at least my body is still getting smaller and that's the goal. So still on track!

Week 1 done and dusted

I started A New Weighs 12 week challenge last week and I'm not going to sit here and say it's easy, it takes some will power but it is totally worth it.

I made it through Easter weekend with only one teeny tiny mishap with a little chocolate egg but other than that only healthy food and exercise.

I lost 3kgs and 8 centimeters which I am super happy about because I never loose massive weight with my insulin resistance.

A New Weigh

Today is the start of my A New Weigh 12 week challenge! I am so excited and so scared all at the same time.

I have never eally struggled with my weight till last year when in 6 months I picked up 10kgs for no reason at all, my doctor tested for everything and eventually diagnosed me with Insulin Resistance and put me on diabetic meds and sent me to a dietitian, I managed to loose 5kgs there but then my body just stopped and I lost moral to carry on and in the last 3 months picked it all up again and screwed up my insulin levels all over again and if I carry on this way I will end up being diabetic.

And so I start a new journey and a new challenge to try correct my heads way of seeing food and fitness.

I will catch up with you weekly on how it is going and how I am loosing and after 12 weeks will share with closed eyes my before shots and hopefully amazing after shots.

Here's to a new me.

I've been quiet but I've been busy

Life sometimes throws you lemons.

Sometimes it doesn't just rain it pours.

And sometimes the glass isn't half full it's empty.

Well that's how I am feeling at the moment. I am however waking up everyday and fighting those feelings. Trying to stay positive.  Trying to find my balance again.

I won't go into all the little details of my dirty laundry, it doesn't really matter, my life is all a bit jumbled at the moment and I have to put the pieces back together. Which i know I'm strong enough to do.

When I feel this out of sorts i like to make gratitude lists to keep me focused on whats important.

Heres my list:

1. My beautiful son
2. My supportive family
3. Having a roof over my head even if it's not mine.
4. Having food on the table every day.
5. Having work even if it is not quite enough to get by.
6. Being on meds that keep me stable.
7. Having hope that I still have a relationship even if its a bit complicated right now.
8. Finding Aiden a great new school
9. Getting another chance to change the course of my future.
10. Tea :)

There are always things worth fighting for and living for we just have to remember them.

Love from Bear

100 Happy Days!

If you haven't noticed the hashtag #100happydays popping up on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter yet you might need to look at some happier friends ;)

It's a really simple concept and a really easy, free, no strings attached challenge, to find one thing in every day for 100 days that makes you happy and take a snap of it and post it to your Social Media platform of choice.

It's never to late to start, just go the their website, register and start getting happy.

So far I have made it to day 9 and yes one or two days it was a struggle to find a slither of light, but it is their, it is always their, you just need to find it and choose it.

My Bunny Frankie

A healthy treat after a hard gym session

Trees at my moms place

Cuddles with my little boy

A weekend away!

My relationship with my mommy

Coming home to this smile after a weekend away

Working for myself allows occasional naps

A rather annoying disco ball my boyfriend decided to hang from my review mirror

Changes and dreams

There are years that ask questions and years that answer - Zora Neale Hurston

I stopped making New Year Resolutions last year as I always failed them rather quickly. Personal opinion, they kind of made to be broken and it's setting up yourself to feel like a failure.

I know this year I want to make a lot of changes, there are a lot of things I want to achieve and a lot of new and old goals I want to get to.

2013 was a rough year, a challenging year, it challenged my personal strength in tremendous ways, it forced me to look inside myself and see what is wrong, how I am damaged, how I perceive my reality and what my life really is from the inside.

Every one around me see's me as this strong, independent woman, which I am in a lot of ways but in many more ways I am broken, and I broke this year, my weaknesses came shining through and it was the best thing that could have ever happened to me because now I see my future and I see who I want to be again as a person, I found my soul again, I found my inspiration. 

So instead of resolutions I have aspirations.

So what do I want to change...

1. I want to learn to be patient with others because no one person thinks the same way.

2. I want to be a more compassionate and nurturing mother, I'm great at the providing aspects and spoiling       aspects but my natural motherhood needs a lot of work.

3. I want to learn to love, I love internally, I will never outwardly express my feelings for any one.

4. I want to learn to be optimistic.  I have a nasty habit of seeing the bad and missing the good.

5. I want to forgive, not others but myself, I truly am my worst enemie and my biggest critic.

What are my goals...

1. My health, I was diagnosed with Insulin Resistance and I really am failing most days at beating bad habits,     I'm 5kgs down but I have 8.5kgs to go before I reach my goal.

2. I want to run a 10km race. Why, I dont know, I just want to prove that I can.

3. I want to stop smoking, I really do, I just need to figure out how.

4. I will defeat my fear of driving.

5. I want to take my business to a whole new level and double its annual turnover.

My dreams...

Are simple, I want to be happy, not tomorrow but today and every day. I want to love my life in each moment and stop waiting for something else, something more because that want never goes away but now is gone in a second and you can never get it back, it's a mere moment but it's your moment to live and to conquer.

Love from Bear