Bullying defused

My worries of Aiden being bullied still stands, he still comes home and tells me he is being hurt by so and so kid and he is picking up their bad behavior of spitting and kicking shins which I am less than happy about but his school have taken it in their stride and tried to help come to a conclusion or should I say some kind of solution.

I do love Aiden's school and that is why he is still there, it is a good school and they can't be held completely liable for the fact that they have uncontrollable children, it does happen. The fact that Aiden has a teacher he happily goes to in the mornings and that he is taught well and does extra murals and does school concerts and plays outside and I do feel safe leaving my kid there, those things count.

Bullying or bad behaviour of other children will probably happen in every school and will continue through out Aidens life so I am teaching him at home that he must stand up for himself and I talk to him about why he mustn't be mean to others but mustn't tolerate people being mean to him.

It's a hard situation to be thrown in because I don't want to dismiss what Aiden is telling me as just "kid talk" because I am happy he feels safe enough to tell me but I also don't want to be a over paranoid parent.

All in all, betweens the meetings with the school and giving it time and seeing how Aiden carries on I will make a decisions accordingly but for now I still love Aiden's school and think it is the best in the area.

Mommy guilt

I am a yeller.

I have a short temper.

I have no patience.

And as much as I know this and as much as every day when I wake up and tell myself I am going to stop and change, I always fail.

I read this article the other day and it brought me to tears because I don't want Aiden to fear me, I dont want him to fear making mistakes or to be to scared to come to me when he has done something wrong.

I yell over spilt milk, if he wiggles to much when I change his nappy, when he splashes and makes the whole bathroom wet. I yell at him for basically just being a kid.

And I hate myself for it.

I knew when I fell pregnant it would be something I struggled with, I have always been a perfectionist,  I have always liked things to be done right and in a certain way but I forget that this is a child learning, exploring and finding his feet in the world and I am hindering him from doing it.

I am not talking about discipline, he needs that, I know when he is naughty and I loose my cool it's understandable but I am talking about messing yogurt or taking his shoes off right after I have put them on.

The guilt consumes me and I feel like the worst mother alive. I see how my family look at me and they have told me before to calm down, my mother has even removed Aiden from my presence so that I cam calm down and Aiden can too.

I am creating the monster who yells back at me, I created the tantrums and the screaming when he is not being heard.

I am creating a yeller by being one.

Love from Bear